What I Needed

My present condition can be summarized in one sentence: I've been happier since yesterday. As I sat in church on Sunday morning, I felt like whatever people were saying that day was everything I needed to hear. This past weekend was when I finally could admit to myself and others that I wasn't okay. I was living a lie as I continually clung onto my pride - I was only fooling myself as I tried to convince myself I was strong and could overcome this obstacle on my own. What Jaeson Ma tweeted today was what I learned in a nutshell, "Put your life in God's hands & He will be able to keep you from falling. Temptation comes when we put our trust in ourselves, not in God."

My values are very important to me. While there are some values that have been modified over the years, there are others that have not and will not ever change. Despite this, I could feel my judgment wavering during these past few weeks. As I listened to both sides of two very convincing perspectives, I became scared as I was being swayed by their arguments. However, the good thing that has come out of this experience is that it only motivates me to take greater measures to yield against these temptations. You could say that I brought this all upon myself and now am presently facing the consequences of my actions, but I have no regrets and what has happened has already happened. All I can say is that I'm grateful for this test of faith and I'm learning to be content in all circumstances. This doesn't mean I'm happy but it means I've come to terms with the situation and am now striving to get back onto the right track. Storms come in different versions and this is just another one I'm going through. I no longer need confirmation to know if what I'm doing is right 'cause I know it is. True love waits.